Mini-vacation

Going down to San Diego today. Will be nice to get away with B. I hope its refreshing and helps me keep perspective. Also, going to get this puppy at 1pm at the shelter…if someone doesn’t steal him again first!

Mission Beach, San Diego - Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/moonjazz/2615782605/

I had a big disappointment last night, disappointment in myself.it was so unnecessary and I’m really discouraged by it. I am trying to pick up and carry on this morning, because I want that to be over, I want to be stronger.I have all of the schools, and it’s okay to fail at somethings. But it’s not okay with me to fail as often as I do with this thing. Sometimes it seems inevitable that I have to give into it, but the times when I could fight harder but don’t are what really gets me. Last night was like. I could have kept going and would have been so proud of myself today. I just want to end up using todayitself as a day to feel proud of myself, then we can use a good weekend. I can give myself a treat on Sunday, and then work hard next week.

Maybe it will help to have a dog. I want to have a plan, something I do each time first before giving in. I want that to be petting my dog. Then going on a walk. Then taking a bath. Before I do anything stupid.

this really sucks. I feel so gross today. When happens I feel hopeless and self-esteem plummets. I want to remember that when I don’t to that, I at least feel proud of myself.

 

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5 thoughts on “Mini-vacation

  1. I think I no what your talking about…and girl, I’m right there with you…but I do it everynight. I treat myself during the day and still binge. 😦 It’s horrible and I feel like crap and just want to fall asleep and wake up and be rid of it all…

    But – your last post!! So many good things in your life! Good luck with the interview! And the writing?!! Are you serious?? With a local publisher? How did you find out about that , etc? So great 🙂

    • Thanks! go to about.com and search for short story contests in June. There are some great articles listing all the contests by month around the country if you want to submit one. Then you can choose which contest and which area, etc. I will email you the exact link if you want. 🙂

  2. I don’t blame you for wanting a dog to walk to get out of the house! It’s hard to do it on your own sometimes isn’t it? We’ll get there! Have a great vacation!!

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