Happy Valentine’s Day! <3

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I miss B very much today, can’t wait to just BE TOGETHER.

At least today we will find out what his offer here will be and can decide which job he will take and then know where we will be going.

That will help a lot. Then we can plan and I can plan. I will also want to know WHEN we can be together exactly but guess I will just have to wait and keep planning my things, like my French class. And getting on a schedule with continuing writing my book. My arms hurt to much for awhile to type but I think they might be okay today so I am going to try again. And we are going to look into getting a program where I can talk and it will type for me. If I could set up a good weekly schedule with swim every morning, write and do volunteer work from home in the afternoon, and french class two evenings, I think that would be really great for this Spring.

So yeah, I feel a little sad today missing my sweetheart, and just lonely in general lately. Some of my fear has come back, and definite frustration about feeling so paralyzed in my life. Maybe I will feel better today making a decision about B’s job and finding out more of a timeline from that. I don’t know what to do today but stay in the moment, read a lot, write like I said, go swim later if I want to, rest, and do the normal schedule again tomorrow.

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