Saturday night ramblings

I think one of my new medicines is making me more hungry. Today I did something I usually don’t do though, I just went with it. I was craving carbohydrates and I decided to just eat until I was satisfied.

It wasn’t the healthiest things, for instance right now I just ate two bagels with cream cheese and a bowl of cereal. But I realized I wasn’t hungry anymore after that, and I didn’t binge. Am I going to feel afraid tomorrow because of this, yes, very. But I am going to let it go. I am going to fight to get up and do my plan. Things will fall into place on their own. I am going to go swimming a lot this week, and believe that I deserve to. I am going to do deep breathing a lot. I may stop taking this medicine for a week and see if I don’t have this problem. I just need one swim and then I will be fine and I will stay on top but know I do need to eat sometimes.

Random ramblings…sorry. Sigh, every day is a struggle. But if I am patient with myself, I will get back to where I want to be.

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