Finally feels like Summer!

It is so warm today, I am going to venture and say hot. My dad and I say there are two seasons: hot and cold. I like hot, can’t get too hot for me! As long as it’s dry heat like we have here in Colorado. I will never live in a humid place, it makes me feel physically ill! I can’t even stand a touch of humidity.

I also believe that each person has sort-of a set body temperature from birth (like they have a tendency to lean one way or another their whole lives — they either run hot or they run cold.) I run cold – meaning I LIKE the weather hot, am always cold, etc. If you run hot, you get hot easily and are always turning the heater down in the winter (ie. my mother – and no, its not menopause – she has always been like that!).

My dad and I like the hot weather, maybe a little to the extreme. I don’t like any AC on in the summer at all, ever! What are you? A hot or a cold person? Or in-between?

I feel really dehydrated this morning and just kind of weak but I still feel determined in my resolution yesterday and feel like I have hit a turning point. Like I said, today will be hard but then I will have it!

Some confessions:

  • I don’t really have a camera right now. All the pictures I have put up on here so far are taken with my webcam – that’s why they look so awful and there aren’t mini! I just found my old digital camera that my boyfriend gave me when he got a new one, but I dont’ have a USB cord that works for it! Gotta get on that…
  • I HATE OATMEAL AND YOGURT! Everytime I see all these bloggers eating those two things, I cringe! I can do oatmeal sometimes if it’s steel cut oats, but I hate yogurt in all forms and with all toppings!
  • Okay, thats all. For now…

I am about to head out swimming! I decided I need to stop worrying about swimming. I worry about if I go too much that my arms will get sore and I won’t be able to go tomorrow and then I will freak out because I won’t have any way to relieve my stress….and on and on, its this cascade of worry and thoughts. I need to keep telling myself two things: I CAN go EVERY day if I want, and my body will tell me when it’s too sore to go and then I have other things I can use like my medication and DBT skills for just that ONE day.

I need to live in today and not worry every second about tomorrow!

I know I talk about medication on here. For two years, until last summer, I refused to take ANY medication, not even Advil. But part of my journey since August has been to accept that I have mental problems and a mental illness that need it, that go beyond just situational depression, and the I DESERVE to take it right now so I don’t have to suffer anymore. I still worry about it all the time, but is really one of the first self-love things I did for myself in a long, long time.

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